So I was feeling a little reminiscent this evening. And when I feel this way, I often go back to wondering where Jean went ... my long, lost, sweet friend. She was my very first best friend .. we met in Grade 4.
So, every few years, I recall her phone number that I can't seem to forget ... so tonight I dialed it and talked with her dad. Harry drove me to school for years. Jean and I would sit in the backseat of his car and listen to his AM radio station. Sometimes he would stop at the corner store before school and buy Jean and I a treat for our lunch. I remember Dill Pickle chips .....
I thought it would be fun to put up the facebook thread between the 'remaining' friends who were in our little group. Kim, Daphne, Sheri and I have kept in touch .... here is the thread that I started back in 2008.
**************************
So, every few years, I recall her phone number that I can't seem to forget ... so tonight I dialed it and talked with her dad. Harry drove me to school for years. Jean and I would sit in the backseat of his car and listen to his AM radio station. Sometimes he would stop at the corner store before school and buy Jean and I a treat for our lunch. I remember Dill Pickle chips .....
I thought it would be fun to put up the facebook thread between the 'remaining' friends who were in our little group. Kim, Daphne, Sheri and I have kept in touch .... here is the thread that I started back in 2008.
**************************
hi old friends.......i had a dream about all of us the other day, it was nice, it was like we had had a visit together.....i think we were having one of our famous sleepovers! (Sheri, your dad brought the chips!)
Have any of you heard from jean? i can't find her and haven't spoken with her in a long time--even her dad doesn't know her number the last i spoke with him....he waits until she calls him. What were your last contacts with her?
funny....i can see your faces on facebook, its nice to know where you are......but not knowing where she is, feels un-nerving, you know?
love Sharon
Have any of you heard from jean? i can't find her and haven't spoken with her in a long time--even her dad doesn't know her number the last i spoke with him....he waits until she calls him. What were your last contacts with her?
funny....i can see your faces on facebook, its nice to know where you are......but not knowing where she is, feels un-nerving, you know?
love Sharon
September 29, 2008
9/29, 11:46am
Hi Honey, I know you worry about Jean, me too. I tried finding Briony or Bryony Kirk to see if they are still in contact but I can't even remember how to spell her name. Sharon do you have your yearbooks?
Can't find Arianda Choptiani either. She went to the UK after BH, any chance she and Jean stayed in contact?
I can hardly imagine what a sleep over with all of us would be like now.
Thanks for trying, and reminding us to try. k
Can't find Arianda Choptiani either. She went to the UK after BH, any chance she and Jean stayed in contact?
I can hardly imagine what a sleep over with all of us would be like now.
Thanks for trying, and reminding us to try. k
9/29, 1:00pm
Daphne Guerrero
Hearing that Jean's dad doesn't even have her number really does worry me...I last saw Jean in 2002 - I was passing through Toronto and stopped to see her. I thought everything was great but then after, she emailed me to effectively end our friendship and cut off all contact with me. I was really hurt and very confused after being so harshly dumped by one of my closest friends, but through time came to understand that she was bent on cutting people she had previously been close with out of her life. That's not to say that I have given up on looking for her; I just didn't want to face that awful rejection again. Six years later and supported by friends (hi Kim), I think I'm up to trying.
So here's what I know - most of it second-hand from Sheri, Mia and others: I had heard she moved back to Winnipeg from Toronto some time ago (2003-4?), and was spotted by Janet Sartore at a bar. I think Ariadna is actually back in Winnipeg; and I think Mia still keeps in touch with her so I'll ask her to ask Ari if she she's heard from Jean.
daphne.
So here's what I know - most of it second-hand from Sheri, Mia and others: I had heard she moved back to Winnipeg from Toronto some time ago (2003-4?), and was spotted by Janet Sartore at a bar. I think Ariadna is actually back in Winnipeg; and I think Mia still keeps in touch with her so I'll ask her to ask Ari if she she's heard from Jean.
daphne.
9/29, 1:57pm
Kim Lear
Hi Daphne, it has been a while - 10 yrs?
I feel like I have the least grasp on this. I don't have much sense of what was going on with Jean after I left BH. Does anyone know where the eating disorder came from? Did she get hurt at some point?
Daphne, did she give you the impression that she felt abandoned by us? Or was she angry at us specifically? Or is she trying to erase everything to do with that time in her life?
It's hard to know if we should respect her desire to start over without us.
I feel like I have the least grasp on this. I don't have much sense of what was going on with Jean after I left BH. Does anyone know where the eating disorder came from? Did she get hurt at some point?
Daphne, did she give you the impression that she felt abandoned by us? Or was she angry at us specifically? Or is she trying to erase everything to do with that time in her life?
It's hard to know if we should respect her desire to start over without us.
September 29, 2008
9/29, 10:26pm
SK Burdge
hi daphne and sheri (kim already knows this)-but i called jeans dad this afternoon (after all these years, since grade 4, i still know that phone number by heart!)--turns out he had been asked by jean NOT to give out her number...not sure if it was just to me, or by anyone in her past. But this has me really troubled and i am about to write a letter and mail it to her dad to give to her.
Daphne, what did her email say after your visit that 'appeared' to be fine? How did she go about 'dumping' you? its soo weird, how and why would she cut off all ties??
love Sharon
Daphne, what did her email say after your visit that 'appeared' to be fine? How did she go about 'dumping' you? its soo weird, how and why would she cut off all ties??
love Sharon
September 30, 2008
9/30, 9:23am
Daphne Guerrero
It's been some time, but the crux of that email was that I had taken advantage of her friendship by staying with her when I was in Toronto. (I had done this a handful of times before without incident; the difference this time was that I was with my new boyfriend - now husband.) It seemed rather harsh to me and I spoke to Sheri a few times about it afterwards - we both came to the conclusion that Kim hinted at...that she maybe wants to erase that part of her life. At that time, Jean was going through a particularly tough time trying to figure out who she was and where she belonged - that was my impression. While I agree that we should respect her desire to remain "hidden", I also would like to know how she's doing, I'd like her to know that I still care about her, and I'd also like to confirm that this is really what she wants..people can change their minds right? Or maybe I should just take off my rose-coloured glasses already... wink emoticon
9/30, 11:24am
Sheri Lee
Hi Guys,
Last time I saw and spoke to Jean was Dec 2002, it was actually New Years Eve. We met for lunch that day and chatted for a while, I hadn't seen her in ages...At the time I was engaged and due to be married that coming July. I told Jean how much I would like her to be in attendance at my wedding but she told me she was moving away somewhere and didn't know if she would be around. I asked her where she was moving to and she said she couldn't tell me " it might be bad luck and jinx everything for her." I thought that it was very odd that she wouldn't say where she was moving - but she just refused to tell me.
My whole visit with Jean that day was a little strange. She asked me what I was doing for New Years Eve that night and I had a dinner party to go to, it was dinner with a few couples ...I got the impression Jean was very upset I didn't invite her to the party when she called me later that evening, but honestly, I didn't think she would enjoy a dinner party surrounded by couples she didn't even know. Also, she was a little strange that day and I wasn't sure what to make of it...That was the last time I ever heard from her!
About 2-3 years ago I received a resume at work for a Graphic Designer position I had advertised for and the name on the resume was Jean Lee. Her experience and college education was from Toronto (no mention of High School.) I had a very strong feeling it was our Jean, but the phone number was totally unfamiliar to me. I never called....
That is all I know at this point...I have spoken to Daphne about this a few times already and we have always expressed concern for Jean. At this point I guess I have accepted the fact that if she didn't want us in her life anymore then there was a reason and there was nothing more I could do.
Better run, baby screaming.....
Last time I saw and spoke to Jean was Dec 2002, it was actually New Years Eve. We met for lunch that day and chatted for a while, I hadn't seen her in ages...At the time I was engaged and due to be married that coming July. I told Jean how much I would like her to be in attendance at my wedding but she told me she was moving away somewhere and didn't know if she would be around. I asked her where she was moving to and she said she couldn't tell me " it might be bad luck and jinx everything for her." I thought that it was very odd that she wouldn't say where she was moving - but she just refused to tell me.
My whole visit with Jean that day was a little strange. She asked me what I was doing for New Years Eve that night and I had a dinner party to go to, it was dinner with a few couples ...I got the impression Jean was very upset I didn't invite her to the party when she called me later that evening, but honestly, I didn't think she would enjoy a dinner party surrounded by couples she didn't even know. Also, she was a little strange that day and I wasn't sure what to make of it...That was the last time I ever heard from her!
About 2-3 years ago I received a resume at work for a Graphic Designer position I had advertised for and the name on the resume was Jean Lee. Her experience and college education was from Toronto (no mention of High School.) I had a very strong feeling it was our Jean, but the phone number was totally unfamiliar to me. I never called....
That is all I know at this point...I have spoken to Daphne about this a few times already and we have always expressed concern for Jean. At this point I guess I have accepted the fact that if she didn't want us in her life anymore then there was a reason and there was nothing more I could do.
Better run, baby screaming.....
9/30, 1:05pm
SK Burdge
Thats quite an update.....thank you sheri (and daphne) for them. I can't seem to get her out of my mind these days--i am not sure why suddenly i am concerned, maybe something is going on right now that she needs some contact? Either way, i feel a need to connect.
I am curious why you didn't call the number on the resume Sheri--i would have been SOO curious. Any chance you kept the number since her dad isn't giving it out?
But on one hand, she has never given any signal of wanting to be found again, so maybe i should just wish her well (theoretically) and let it go......
On the other hand, it has been nice to hear from the 3 of you...you were a very special part of my life and i have alot of fun memories of us - Remember getting blown into that bank???!!!!! hahahah i laugh EVERY time i think about it!!!
ok, on that giggle, i should run, 1 baby down, 1 toddler to go and then its down time for me.......lots of love ..... Sharon
ps--sheri--Hayden is looking so handsome-he got big quickly didn't he?? And Noah is adorable-i like the basket picture...happy little soul (is he like that in real life too? hope so)--i think Hayden and Isaac would be friends if we lived closer.
pps-daphne-your pics are beautiful, but none of you and your husband! come on....lets see some shots of the 2 of you!
I am curious why you didn't call the number on the resume Sheri--i would have been SOO curious. Any chance you kept the number since her dad isn't giving it out?
But on one hand, she has never given any signal of wanting to be found again, so maybe i should just wish her well (theoretically) and let it go......
On the other hand, it has been nice to hear from the 3 of you...you were a very special part of my life and i have alot of fun memories of us - Remember getting blown into that bank???!!!!! hahahah i laugh EVERY time i think about it!!!
ok, on that giggle, i should run, 1 baby down, 1 toddler to go and then its down time for me.......lots of love ..... Sharon
ps--sheri--Hayden is looking so handsome-he got big quickly didn't he?? And Noah is adorable-i like the basket picture...happy little soul (is he like that in real life too? hope so)--i think Hayden and Isaac would be friends if we lived closer.
pps-daphne-your pics are beautiful, but none of you and your husband! come on....lets see some shots of the 2 of you!
10/24, 2:10pm
Sheri Lee
Hey guys,
It's funny how things happen...Andrew bumped into a guy he knew at the store the other day and funny enough he was with Jean's brother...This came up because he said to Andrew," we were just talking about you the other day because your name came up in conversation with Jean Lee, you're married to Sheri right?" Apparently Jean was in town the other week and they were talking about Andrew and I...Andrew didn't ask a lot of questions because he was in a rush (and he's a guy) but he did confirm that Jean was living in Toronto....That's all I know.
I wish Andrew would of asked more questions about Jean or even told his brother to have Jean call me, but Andrew said he was in a rush and didn't want to seem creepy by asking too many questions...Oh well, that's guys for you.
Well that's all I know, but at least we know where she lives now...
Sheri
P.S Daphne, I want to see some baby bump pics !!!
It's funny how things happen...Andrew bumped into a guy he knew at the store the other day and funny enough he was with Jean's brother...This came up because he said to Andrew," we were just talking about you the other day because your name came up in conversation with Jean Lee, you're married to Sheri right?" Apparently Jean was in town the other week and they were talking about Andrew and I...Andrew didn't ask a lot of questions because he was in a rush (and he's a guy) but he did confirm that Jean was living in Toronto....That's all I know.
I wish Andrew would of asked more questions about Jean or even told his brother to have Jean call me, but Andrew said he was in a rush and didn't want to seem creepy by asking too many questions...Oh well, that's guys for you.
Well that's all I know, but at least we know where she lives now...
Sheri
P.S Daphne, I want to see some baby bump pics !!!
10/25, 8:32am
SK Burdge
i had another dream about jean last night and decided to wrap up this letter i have been working on (will you all want to see it before i send it??) Also, if you want to include something (as kim has offered already), why don't you send me something and i will make it its own page and include it.
S.
S.
10/25, 9:21am
SK Burdge
ok, letter to mr. lee and to jean is done and i will be mailing it out monday if you want to include anything-that would be cool--but i need it by tommorow! btw: i love this --this thread of talking to the 3 of you....i totally love it.
10/27, 2:11am
SK Burdge
this is what i have gotten from mia --
''''''I know. It's very sad about Jean. She was going through a very difficult time in the years after high school. She and I spent a lot of time together in the late 1990s when we were both living in Toronto. She seemed to be doing really well then - she was in design school and loving Toronto. But the last I saw her she was really struggling again. She and Daphne had a big falling out - I can't remember when it was but it was after I left Toronto anyway. And she seemed to just cut off everyone else at that point too.
I can only hope that she has found peace.''''
i am sending the letter tommorow.....love Sharon
''''''I know. It's very sad about Jean. She was going through a very difficult time in the years after high school. She and I spent a lot of time together in the late 1990s when we were both living in Toronto. She seemed to be doing really well then - she was in design school and loving Toronto. But the last I saw her she was really struggling again. She and Daphne had a big falling out - I can't remember when it was but it was after I left Toronto anyway. And she seemed to just cut off everyone else at that point too.
I can only hope that she has found peace.''''
i am sending the letter tommorow.....love Sharon
10/27, 9:53am
Daphne Guerrero
Hi Sharon, I read your last messages too late to think about including something with your letter. I'd still very much like to know how she responds though..d.
10/27, 10:12am
SK Burdge
you mean 'if' she responds...i am not expecting any response to be honest, but i needed to let her know some things. daphne....if there is something you want to include, the letter is still here open.....kim sent something early this morning.....is there anything you would want to say? let her know about new baby coming? thats such exciting news......if there was a weird rift that happened between the 2 of you, now is a good chance to be the one to bridge something even if it was her doing......just a thought anyways!! xoxoxo how are you feeling with baby anyways? sick or good?
9:05pm
SK Burdge
Hey old friends .... felt another pull tonight to call Jeans dad....so, recalling the phone number that I can't seem to forget since grad 4, I dialed and this is the update.
Jean, along with her sister Helen, have disconnected completely from the parents. Harry doesn't understand what he and his wife could have done that both daughters would separate and cut all connections with family. Its been over 10 years since they have heard from Helen, and a few years since they have received a call from Jean. He is terribly sad and was interested to hear that we all had such nice memories of Jean early on because according to him, Balmoral was awful for her. I said, not to discount her pain of the grades 11 and 12, we had a sweet bond with the 5 of us that included sleepovers and a friendship I still smile when I think about. it was really at the end of grade 10 until grad that everyone just started separating and trying to find their own way...and it was hard for all of us to watch Jean work out like crazy and not eat and just get skinnier and skinnier, nobody knew what to do. But she was very loved and this seemed to surprise him, which makes me sad.
Anyways ... he said she actually got her masters in Occupational Therapy and is traveling around in the states working. But because of the restrictions of Canadians working in the states, she doesn't stay in one place too long. Last he heard she was in Oregon.
So friends .... there we are. I keep thinking of our sweet Jean Mary Lee is drifting out in a boat and I know she is out there and I want to drag her back in. She was one of my very first best friends, grade 4!!! But, I think it will just be one of those fading memories that the 3 of us share that we will never know the story. But I think every few years, I will pick up that rope and give it a tug.
Love Sharon
Jean, along with her sister Helen, have disconnected completely from the parents. Harry doesn't understand what he and his wife could have done that both daughters would separate and cut all connections with family. Its been over 10 years since they have heard from Helen, and a few years since they have received a call from Jean. He is terribly sad and was interested to hear that we all had such nice memories of Jean early on because according to him, Balmoral was awful for her. I said, not to discount her pain of the grades 11 and 12, we had a sweet bond with the 5 of us that included sleepovers and a friendship I still smile when I think about. it was really at the end of grade 10 until grad that everyone just started separating and trying to find their own way...and it was hard for all of us to watch Jean work out like crazy and not eat and just get skinnier and skinnier, nobody knew what to do. But she was very loved and this seemed to surprise him, which makes me sad.
Anyways ... he said she actually got her masters in Occupational Therapy and is traveling around in the states working. But because of the restrictions of Canadians working in the states, she doesn't stay in one place too long. Last he heard she was in Oregon.
So friends .... there we are. I keep thinking of our sweet Jean Mary Lee is drifting out in a boat and I know she is out there and I want to drag her back in. She was one of my very first best friends, grade 4!!! But, I think it will just be one of those fading memories that the 3 of us share that we will never know the story. But I think every few years, I will pick up that rope and give it a tug.
Love Sharon
